Another Re-birthday
Tomorrow will be the anniversary, my "re-birthday" when life stated over from square one. Thirteen years ago I heard the word "hypermobile" for the first time. I was 39 years old and a chiropractor had just rotated my neck and commented on my extreme flexibility.
That first side of my neck adjusted upon first attempt, but the other side just wouldn't realign. After multiple attempts, my vertebral artery was ruptured in the back of my neck and I instantly experience two catastrophic (either should have been fatal) brain bleeds (strokes) there on the treatment table, initially triggering a seizure, blindness, slurred speech, and a rapid progression to loss of consciousness.
I was in the hospital for nearly 2 months, shocking doctors that I even survived the first night. I had to relearn how to breathe without a machine, swallow, see, hear (we eventually discovered I had lost 70-90% of my hearing), sit up without two adults holding me, bladder control, and everything a new baby must learn.Over the first 26 days, I had 4 more strokes (a total of 6) as the artery tried to heal and kept throwing new clots. Every day, I wasn't expected to survive another day. Two experimental, emergency surgeries on Thanksgiving Day finally stopped further stroking. I was to live out the remainder of my days as a "vegetable" in a nursing home. I would certainly never walk again!
But God... I'm now 52, walking with a cane (that I'm growing less and less dependent upon), seeing with special glasses, hearing with hearing aids, and still baffling doctors that I'm even alive with "as little brain tissue as you have left" (a doctor's perplexed words to me about 6 or 7 years ago). There are still some things I haven't mastered, like basic math, or driving, paperwork management, and coherent writing without wandering off in every direction a bagillion edits needed to accomplish readability. My memory, the long term but especially the short term, is so unreliable! But I look and usually act "normal" enough now that most people don't even realize I'm disabled when they very first meet me now.
I'm practicing long-passage (whole book) Scripture memory as ongoing brain training, using the Bible to very literally renew my mind. While I don't retain the ability to quote a long passage weeks after I have learned it (recitation videos to keep me accountable, most current work found by clicking the "live" tab), this daily practice keeps my mind sharp, heart refreshed, and I trust the Holy Spirit that He will use what I've intentionally deposited in my heart, when He needs to remind me of specific truths.
I'm pretty open, so feel free to ask questions. My @ is InfertilityMom on most social media, if you care to connect other places as well. (Currently, I'm most active on Instagram , through I've gone through fazes, sometimes preferring Pinterest, Twitter/X, or Facebook, so all the links are below.)
Scripture quotations taken from the (LSB®) Legacy Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2021 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Managed in partnership with Three Sixteen Publishing Inc. LSBible.org and 316publishing.com
I would love to meet you through social media:
author page - facebook.com/HarvestingHope
Specialty pages:
infertility / loss - fb.com/HannahsHopeBook
stroke - fb.com/StrokieGal
current book project on church deception - fb.com/DeceptionUnmasked
My books:
Read about my current book project about deceptions women face from within the church, at JenniferSaake.blogspot.com/2021/04/DeceptionUnmasked.html
Read more about infertility, miscarriage, adoption loss, and my first book, Hannah's Hope (written pre-stroke), at JenniferSaake.blogspot.com/2021/04/hannahs.html
Please enjoy a free pdf version of the introduction, my personal infertility / loss story, and the first chapter of Hannah's Hope at www.hannahshopebook.com/media/HannahHopeChapter1.pdf
Your story is absolutely humbling—thank you for sharing it with such honesty and grace. The way you’ve fought to reclaim your life, piece by piece, is inspiring beyond words. From relearning basic functions to training your brain with Scripture—that’s a testimony of resilience and faith if I’ve ever seen one.
ReplyDeleteI was especially struck by your mention of hearing loss and your use of hearing aids. A close friend of mine also experienced sudden hearing loss after a medical trauma, and we found this guide to some of the best OTC hearing aids helpful in navigating options that are both accessible and effective.
Praying continued strength for you on your healing journey. You are a miracle and a light!